The Lord is my shepherd…even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me…
Psalm 23
What is your “take away”?
What have you learned from this experience? Has it made you look at life any differently? These are the questions I am asked by my
friends and that I have asked myself over these past few weeks as I rehab from
my CABG (Short for coronary artery bypass graft)
surgery. Kind of a cool acronym don’t
you think? Try throwing that out at a
party some time, “Yes, as a CABG survivor now of two months…” People will look
at you funny and sympathize that they also weren’t particularly pleased with
their vegetarian diet either, but have I tried gluten free or vegan? But I digress…
How does one express what it feels like to be delighted
in? Is it appropriate, or arrogant to
let on that this is the way you feel? Is
it okay, or selfish to find joy in knowing that you matter to those in your
circle of friends? Can it really be this
good to sit in the company of friends? I must say as one who struggles with needing
to work for approval from my friends and from the One who calls me His beloved,
this has been a wonderful lesson in, “be still and know.”
I described in my last post, Visiting Hell in the Company of Angels, the incredible blessing of
new friends and old in the midst of the CABG experience itself, and have been
overwhelmed in the days following at the continued outpouring of love and
support from our family and community of friends. What does it look like?
-
Surprise and delight on the faces of folks when
I run into them and the heartfelt, “It
is so good to see you.” The first Sunday I was able to serve communion
at the front of the church after the surgery, those words were said to me by
those I was serving before I could begin to say, “This is the body of Jesus
broken for you, and His blood shed so you will know how much He loves
you.” All words said around a meal
celebrating community. The message? I am so glad you are still with us. For me, my response to those words, “It is
nice to be seen.” Yes, it is good to
still be with.
-
Meals. We
didn’t cook for a month or more thanks to all the fine food and desserts
brought. The food almost as big a treat
as the faces and conversations of those who delivered it.
-
Almost no one shakes my hand any more when they
see me, instead I get hugs, yep from all those pretty ladies, but just as
meaningful, from the men as well. I’ve had folks search me out after church,
come down off their porches, and interrupt conversations so they can give me a
hug. It is amazing all that is said in a
hug.
-
Lots of cards, emails, phone calls and loads of
prayers. A new perspective on prayers,
by the way. I so appreciate the prayers
of those who lifted me up when they were not and could not be present, that
they would remember me in their absence is humbling and a great comfort. I noticed too that most of my friends did not
feel the need to say a prayer when they were with me, yet I felt completely
wrapped in prayer by their presence. Words are important when one is not there,
but often not necessary when one is present.
What a gift to be wrapped in prayer in the absence of prayers.
-
Friends who came and picked me up and took me to
lunch when I was unable to drive. The many who have dropped by for a chat.
-
My neighbors who have not just mowed my yard,
but trimmed and blown the drive way while I am restricted from “heavy labor.”
That
is just scratching the surface of all I have been given these past few
weeks. I have been greatly loved, not
because I am worthy or particularly lovable, but because I am in the company of
loving friends and family. In such
company I am finding, worthiness is not necessary, it is a gift given with open
hands and hearts.
I
read in Isaiah 62:4 this morning that we are called “His delight.” We are told that God’s people are His body
and that He actually lives in us. His
people are His physical presence here. No wonder then that my biggest take away
from this experience is that I have truly experienced the presence and the
delight of Jesus in the faces of my family and friends. I have experienced in them what I so
desperately want to be true, that the One who breathed me into being doesn’t
just love me, awesome as that is, but that He delights in me. That is overwhelming, and I have been overwhelmed.
